As we grow older, we get to know ourselves more. We know what we want, our limits, when to say yes, and when to say no. More importantly, we know what kind of people we want to keep as friends and what kind we should avoid. So far, these are the people I try to avoid being with:
1. People severely insecure about themselves: Somehow, I have realized that I do have a strong personality. A professor of mine in UP Law, who has become a great friend and mentor through the years, told me when I was in first year law school that I have the tendency to make the people around me feel threatened. Another professor, this time from the US law school, told me that I do appear impressive and intimidating whenever I enter a room. More recently, a colleague of mine here in this city told me that he thinks someone in the office might think I am a threat. And when I asked him why, this is what he said: "Well, you get the other people’s attention even though you don’t try to. She, on the other hand, has to struggle to make them notice her." So therefore, I conclude, that in three continents, I scare insecure people.
I never really liked being "impressive and intimidating" because that also meant making the people very insecure about themselves hiss at me whenever I am around. So, I avoid insecure people because they try to hit, scratch, and bite even before they get to know me. They usually see me as a threat…which I think is really ridiculous. I have not said anything yet, and immediately these people have somehow formed in their minds what they think I think about them. Scary really, because more often than not, I really don’t have any sort of opinion about them. People who are really insecure about themselves also have the tendency to assert their dominance over people like me. And sorry, I really don’t like that. I have my own mind and I know what I want. I guess thats scares them and pisses them off. Oh well.
2.People who are both arrogant and stupid: These are the people I often encounter in Philippine politics. They are so full of themselves, but they are the most stupid people walking this earth. These are the pompous politicians who patronizingly claim that they care for the masses and that they are true public servants, but they really don’t have a clue how to go about running a barrio, baranggay, siyudad, probinsya, nasud. They actually feel good about themselves by giving a kilo of rice to poor and starving people and claim that that is already public service! Stupid gits.
I really don’t mind arrogant people, but they should know what they are doing. I had a classmate in the US who knew he was intelligent and he made sure people knew this. He is one of the most arrogant people I know, but I didn’t mind this because he did have brains. Kolya and I became really great friends and until now, even though he is already in the Ukraine, we still communicate with each other often.
So there…these are the people I try my hardest not to be involved with. Sometimes, it is hard because there are times, someone may start out to be a really good friend and as years pass by, he or she evolves into one of the people above. This has happened several times already and it makes me sad. Still, as Anton said, we must embrace realism…constant change. If that is the way things have become, then so be it.
